November 21, 2006 - Tuesday

November 21, 2006 - Tuesday
please ignore... is dumb
There are many bums in Holland. Some of them are worse off than others. Admittedly, I am more inclined to notice female bums rather than male bums, but occasionally I will notice the odd male bum – mostly too contemplate the full oddity of that particular bum.

Most interesting to me are those bums on bicycles. Often I find myself gazing just a little to long at a bum on a bicycle, and have to yank my eyeballs away…Why? Why shouldn't i continue to gawk at a bum that has acquired a bicycle? And also bums don't really care if you stare, as long as you give them something: Food or some loose change, for example.

Stupidity!..

They can acquire bicycles because they are everywhere.The place is crawlin with bicycles. And, somehow those bums on bicycles have a slightly hypnotic effect that, if they realized they had, they could surely market and get off the street…

…which is the other place I notice bums; bums walking around, bums going into stores, bums in stores, or bums just hanging around on corners doing absolutely nothing. Much variety as well; adolescent bums, teenage bums, middle-aged bums, and old bums – I don't look at too young or old bums for too long though, as it makes me feel uncomfortable and little bit sad.

Unfortunately, I'm told, crack is rampant amongst bums. Also, the bums in Holland tend to be on the bigger side – particularly the female bums (i'ts tricky making a generalization here because many female bums are covered against the chilly weather). It is difficult for me to get a bead on this particular phenomena other than too create my own meandering theory to these facts:

Fact: There is a very large consumption of cheese going on here. Although cheese is not necessarily known to cause homelessness it certainly can affect bums in a negative way; the electromagnetic quality of cheese causing it to gravitate towards bums. Often I have seen screaming bums fleeing pursuing mobs of rolling Gouda.

Fact: I have been riding around on a bicycle today. It has occurred to me that the particular design of the bicycle may contribute to the larger bums found in Holland; The nature of the exercise tweaking the bums to greater strength and therefore size.

Fact: I'm not even the kind of person that even notices bums. That's not to say that I don't feel some sympathy for them, and even a little respect, but I tend to notice other qualities first rather than a person's income. Basically the fact that I even notice the bums here tells me something dodgy is going on with Dutch bums.

Fact: This is totally assinine

I will try again later